Toddlers, am I right?! They have this pent-up energy that like, never goes away. No matter how many times you replay Frozen, no matter how many times they sprint around the kitchen table, and no matter how many games of hide-and-seek you play with them, it’s like toddlers have a fully-charged battery pack ready to go at all times.
You know what could help with that, exhausted mamas? F***ing outdoor playtime.
Hear me out, okay? Kids — especially toddlers — want to play, want to run, want to get messy, dirty, muddy. And with one of these top-rated, toddler-tested, and mom-approved outdoor playsets, you can give them the mess and play they want, plus the naptime you want post-playtime.
Revert back to the “good ol’ days,” mamas, when kids were sent outside for playtime. They need to burn off that energy — heck, they want to burn it off. So, give the toddlers what they want! From the best climbing toys for toddlers and best outdoor toys for toddlers to the best swing sets for toddlers, these fully equipped outdoor toddler toys will give your tots what they want and ultimately, what you need.
Give ’em a few hours in the sandbox or 30 minutes on the swings… They’ll be snoozing in no time. And you know what that means: Time for your well-deserved nap-time wine-time!
This canopy-clad, pavilion-style outdoor playhouse has pretty much everything your child needs to stay occupied for at an hour at the very least. After all, your kid gets to host his own backyard party, complete with a grill for—you guessed it!—grilling up delicious fake food (which comes with a 16-piece accessory set along with a cool mesh bag), an eating area for fake-eating the fake food and even a sandcastle-making zone. The best part: While he’s in there having the time of his life, you won’t have to worry about re-applying the sunscreen thanks to the canopy cover.
This thing might be an eyesore in your lawn, but your kid will think Disney World just launched a park in your backyard. If you can’t tell by looking at it, it’s a caterpillar—yes, a giant one—that your child can crawl through and have tons of fun with while you get sh*t done. It’s weather- and fade-resistant, so you don’t have to worry about it looking gross after a few rainy days. It’s also Greenguard Gold certified, so you can breathe a sigh of relief knowing that it’s free of harmful chemicals and any dangerous plastic edges.
Don’t live near the beach? No problem! Bring the sandcastles to your backyard with this simple sandbox. It’s as durable as a sandbox can get, so it won’t be sliding around your lawn killing all of your grass. It’s not too big, but not too small, at 3-3/4 ft. x 3-3/4 ft. x 8 in. and the best part is that it’s not a pain in the a** to assemble (for your partner to assemble, of course). You’ll have to fill it with sand and, of course, toys and may want to get a canopy to hang over this puppy. That way you don’t have to go through like, four bottles of sunscreen per week!
Uenjoy Kids Climber Slide Toddler Indoor and Outdoor Freestanding Slide Playset Baby Playground with Basketball Hoop
Got a little Candace Parker in the making? Having a child in the NBA makes for a pretty comfortable lifestyle, ya feel? It’s like WAGS but MADS — Moms and Dads of Sports Stars. All because you bought this Game Time Sports Climber Playset when they were three. This set gives her the gift of playtime practice and you the gift of some peace and quiet for an hour or so. It includes a climbing ladder, slide, basketball hoop and even a ball to score as much net as she can manage.
An outdoor playset doesn’t mean just swings and a slide. Your little tikes will have a blast pretending to be Jack Sparrow as they work the deck of this pirate ship-themed outdoor water table. The anchor raises and lowers, the water cannon can aim and squirt, and by pouring water into the crow’s nest, the water pumps throughout.
Got a pro athlete in training? This pitching machine comes in handy for two purposes: fostering a pro baseball or tennis player in your tiny human and keeping him distracting for hours while you kick your feet up and read a damn book for once. It’s as cheap as an outdoor playset comes and is easy for even the most ADHD parent to figure out how to put together and work: You simply press the red button on the bat to trigger a pitch, then swing, batter batter, swing!
If you really want your kid to chill out, serve her up some ice cream—in chalk form. This all-in-one set gives her the chance to draw, stamp and trace your sidewalks and driveway with what looks pretty darn close to actual ice cream—we’re talking ice cream cones, soft serve swirls, ice pops, jumbo sticks, and more. The set comes with 33 play pieces that will keep her entertained for a while along with three thick stencil sheets. Not only is this good for her imagination, but it washes off with ease (just hose it down).
It may not be as absolutely massive as Stormi’s playhouse that Kris Jenner gifted her for Christmas, but hey, your toddlers will love this playhouse just the same. (After all, we’re not all billionaire makeup moguls.) Inside, your little one will find a sink, cordless phone, and a stove. Plus, there’s a working doorbell in case you ever want to visit, Mom. But we don’t fault you if you don’t visit. After all, kids need their space to play and mama needs her space to chill out and binge-watch The Circle.
Looking for more ways to busy your little ones? Shop quarantine-friendly toys to keep your kiddos entertained for hours!