grandma drama

This Overbearing Mother-In-Law Threw Herself A Baby Shower & Readers Cannot Deal

And the way she went about it was unhinged.

A new mom wants to distance herself from her mother-in-law after the MIL threw herself a baby shower...
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Toxic mothers-in-law strike again! In this jaw-dropping story, shared by a woman looking for support from others to affirm that she is not in the wrong, tension grows between a woman and her mother-in-law resulting in a frustrating situation that would truly piss off anyone.

After moving with her husband to be closer to his family, the OP started to notice some odd behavior from her mother-in-law.

“My mother-in-law has been referring to the baby as ‘her’ baby this entire time. She will say things like ‘I can't wait for my baby to be born.’ ‘My baby is going to be so loved.’ This rubs me the wrong way for reasons I cannot explain, but my husband tells me to ignore her,” she wrote in the popular Reddit subgroup, “Am I The A**hole?”

After eloping and skipping a large reception, much to the chagrin of her mother-in-law, the OP decided to oblige her MIL and agreed to having a baby shower which included several of her MIL’s friends as guests despite not knowing any of them.

“I asked if I could invite my friends, and she said no, that this was for her friends, and that if my friends wanted to throw me a shower they could. I reluctantly agreed,” she wrote before explaining that she and her husband worked on a registry leading up to the day of the shower.

“My MIL asked for it so she could share with her friends. She said she forwarded the registry on. She asked me what design I wanted on my cake and cookies. I told her flowers because I am decorating the nursery in a garden theme,” she continued.

“At the shower they provided me with a ‘mother-to-be’ sash and my MIL a ‘granny to be’ sash to wear. I noticed that the theme of the shower was circus animals. The cake had an elephant and balloons on it, and the cookies were animals. At first I thought that maybe the floral theme was just too difficult, so I rolled with it until it was time to open presents.”

After opening up a handful of gifts, the OP started to notice that all of the gifts were animal-themed and nothing was from her registry.

“I was a little confused and even went so far to check my registry to make sure I hadn't goofed up and changed everything. I thanked everyone for their gifts and tried to sound as gracious as possible, but I was so confused,” she wrote.

Being a bit more brazen than the OP, her husband confronted his mom, asking why the decor and everything gifted was nothing the OP had requested.

The OP’s MIL admitted she didn’t “like” the theme the OP chose for the shower.

“I'm going to decorate my baby's nursery at my house with circus animals, so I created a registry for myself,” the MIL said. “My baby is going to need a room at my house so I threw a shower for myself."

After this admission, the entire situation blew up with the OP’s husband calling his mom “delusional,” to which the MIL quickly gaslighted the couple, crying and accusing the couple of keeping the unborn baby from her.

“We've been getting texts from his family since the shower, calling us selfish and ungrateful and saying we ruined her joy of being a grandma. Are we the AH?” she asked.

The response from Reddit users was overwhelmingly supportive of the couple, noting that this MIL was not going to change her ways and the OP and her husband needed to look at the big picture.

One Reddit user offered some advice that some may find extreme but cautioned the couple to take measures to ensure the safety of their expectant child.

“NTA make sure if she has keys to your home locks are changed. Make sure you invest in security cameras. Let the hospital know your mil is to be no where near your baby. Let them no you and your husband are the only two that fill out any paper works,” they wrote.

“Honestly no contact from the start that away she has no grandparents visitation case. Document every creepy thing she does. Call your dr and tell your pediatrician at the time to pass word protect your medical information. Your mil is unhinged and this has hands that rock the cradle vibes.”

Another commented, “What the actual hell is with grandmothers on Reddit trying to either steal babies or steal their own sons away from their spouses!?! It’s so freaking creepy and absolutely insane. NTA. This woman is not in a healthy enough headspace to be anywhere near your child. I’d be afraid for the baby’s safety.”

After an overwhelming response from users recommending that the OP and her husband go no contact, she responded in a follow-up post.

“We're not certain we want to go 100% NC with MIL at this time, but we want to keep our distance from her for now,” she wrote.

“We did agree that she will not be allowed to be alone with the baby for the foreseeable future. The hospital that I'm giving birth in allows infants to stay in the room with the mother, so my husband and I have agreed that she (the baby) will stay with us as much as possible. We're still up in the air as to whether we're going to allow visitors at the hospital - some of that will be determined how I feel after the birth, if I end up needing a c-section, etc. MIL definitely will not be allowed in the room while I'm delivering (no one but the husband and our medical staff!).”

Despite all the red flags and warnings, the OP still gives her MIL the benefit of the doubt.

“Honestly I suspect MIL will be a good grandma - but she's going to have to earn my and my husband's trust again,” she concluded.

Read the entire Reddit thread here.