Never Kettle For Second Best! These Tea Puns And Jokes Are Mug-nificent

by Team Scary Mommy
Originally Published: 
Tea Puns And Jokes
Mike Kemp/Getty Images

If you’re trying to brew up a good pun, look no further! Tea puns and jokes are your des-tea-ny (seriously, we can’t help ourselves). While other beverages also lend themselves to comedic fodder — here’s looking at you, coffee jokes and wine puns — tea and laughter are a true matcha made in heaven. Perhaps you need to pull a tea-loving friend out of a life slump. Or maybe you’re just looking for a quali-tea caption for your latest Instagram, ahem, mug shot. Whatever your light-hearted need may be, tea puns and jokes are sure to boost the mood.

So, carve out some time between spilling some tea and pouring your own to enjoy the following wit-tea zingers. They’ll keep you laughing for oolong time. We recommend following them up with some food puns to fully satisfy your craving for comedy.

RELATED: Would You Like A Spot Of Tea? These Kids Tea Sets Will Inspire Imaginative Play & Legendary Tea Parties


Best Tea Puns

  1. Hello, is it tea you’re looking for?
  2. Time to part-tea!
  3. Nice tea meet you.
  4. Oolong live the queen!
  5. Can’t we all just get oolong.
  6. Steep dreams are made of tea leaves. (Or sweet dreams are made of tea.)
  7. Varie-tea is the spice of life.
  8. The only way out is brew it.
  9. I’m great at mul-tea-tasking.
  10. Everything I brew, I brew it for you.
  11. If at first you don’t succeed, chai, chai again.
  12. Walk a chamomile in my shoes.
  13. Feeling a bit of deja brew.
  14. Boba tea is unbelie-bubble!
  15. We’re a matcha made in heaven.
  16. Game, set, matcha!
  17. A journey of 1,000 miles begins with a single steep.
  18. Goodnight, steep tight.
  19. You’ve seen the rest, now chai the best!
  20. This is the start of a brew-tea-ful friendship.
  21. I should have studied for the exam, but I procaffeinated instead.
  22. Never kettle for second best.
  23. All fired up and red tea to go.
  24. This tea is hot! I just burned my Lipton on it.
  25. I’m just oolong for the ride.
  26. You’ve gotta admit these puns are quali-tea.

Best Tea Jokes

  1. Which dinosaur loved drinking tea?

The Tea-Rex.

  1. Why did the woman refuse to drink the tea served at the cafe?

It wasn’t her cup of tea.

  1. How did the loving cup of tea greet his wife every day?

“Hello, brew-tea-full!”

  1. How does Moses make tea?

Hebrews it!

  1. What tea makes you original?


  1. Why does the man put a blindfold on whenever he makes tea?

Because a watched pot never boils.

  1. Why did Karl Marx dislike Earl Grey tea?

Because all proper-tea is theft.

  1. What kind of tea is really hard to swallow?


  1. What do you call a man who dips biscuits into his cup of tea?


  1. What did one tea leaf say to the other tea leaf?

“This is a fine mesh we’ve gotten ourselves into!”

  1. Why do the cows return from the fields right when evening tea is ready?

It’s the tea-pot calling the cattle back.

  1. If you put sugar in tea, what do you put in sugar?

A spoon.

  1. Why should you always bring your own cup to a spy’s tea party?

Their cups are always chipped.

  1. Tsunami invited Cyclone, Earthquake, and Drought to a tea party, but no one came.

Tsunami had a silent tea.

  1. What is a ghost pirate’s favorite kind of tea?

Boo tea.

  1. What does a camel ask when they give you a cup of tea?

One hump or two?

  1. Where is the most fertile region for growing tea?


  1. What starts with a “t,” ends with a “t, and is full of “t”?

A teapot.

  1. What do you call a vehicle that comes with a dispenser that makes sweet tea forever?

It’s an Infinite-tea.

  1. Why is lemonade bad?

Because it’s not-tea by nature.

  1. What do you call a small child who can’t drink much tea?

A tea-toddler.

  1. Why don’t hipsters drink iced tea?

Because they drank tea before it was cool.

  1. Patient: “Doctor, I have pain in my eye whenever I drink tea.”

Doctor: “Take the spoon out of your mug.”

  1. Why type of tea does Queen Elizabeth love to drink?


  1. What do workers in a tea factory never get?

Coffee breaks.

  1. What do you call a new material made out of lemons and tea leaves?

Arnold Polymer.

  1. What type of tea does Uncle Sam drink?


  1. I just sorted out all of my tea bags and color-coded the containers.

It was really tea-dious.

  1. What did the students get their favorite teacher who loved tea?

A “Tea-cher of the Year” tea mug.

  1. What do you call the woman who got rich selling tea?

A mult-tea-millionaire.

Boba Puns

  1. We’re a pearl-fect fit for each other.
  2. Hope you’re tapi-OK!
  3. You give me bubble-flies.
  4. You are my bobae.
  5. You make my heart got boba-boba.
  6. I’m feeling bobbly.
  7. You’re pro-boba-ly right.
  8. Taro-t — a soothsaying yam.
  9. You make me feel bubbly inside.
  10. Come out of your bubble.

Boba Jokes

  1. I’m totally cap-bubble of drinking something other than tea.

I just don’t want to!

  1. What did the mommy boba say to the baby boba?

“You are such a cu-tea!”

  1. What do bobas say when they are falling in love?

“You make me feel all bubbly inside.”

  1. What did one bes-tea say to the other bes-tea?

“You are to-tea-ly my best friend.”

  1. If boba tea was in an orchestra, what instrument would it play?

The bubbling bass.

  1. What do you call a chubby baby’s cheeks?

Boba fat.

  1. What do you call a worried bounty hunter?

Boba Fret.

  1. Why doesn’t Boba Fett work with anybody?

He hunts Solo.

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