43 Gym Jokes And Puns That Will Get You Pumped For The Treadmill

by Team Scary Mommy
Originally Published: 
gym jokes
Sarah Pflug/ Burst

Gym jokes and puns aren’t for the weak of body or mind. After all, going to the gym takes motivation and determination (and perspiration, amirite?!). Oh, who are we kidding? Jokes about working out are perfect for just about everyone. Because whether you’re a total gym rat or your idea of cardio is shopping, it’s easy to find humor in gym culture. If you like to break a sweat on the regular, you’ve gotta admit these punchlines are spot-on. And if gym-going is new to you, well, cracking a few funnies about exercise could help knock out any nerves.

Although, let’s be real, sometimes the only thing any of us have the energy to do is put on our gym clothes. For those days, a little laughter might take you a long wayon the treadmill! So, with that in mind, here are some of our favorite gym jokes.

Funny Gym Jokes

  1. Why was the farmer get kicked out of the gym?

He was destroying his calves.

  1. I started using this new machine at the gym. But after an hour, I got really sick.

It had everything though: chips, Oreos, the works!

  1. Why can athletes lift more than prisoners?

Because the pros outweigh the cons.

  1. What exercise do hairdressers do in the gym?


  1. What is a banana‘s favorite gymnastic move?

The splits!

  1. I called the local gym and asked if they could teach me gymnastics.

They asked, “How flexible are you?” I said, “I can’t make Mondays or Fridays.”

  1. What is the bodybuilder’s version of cardio?

Lifting weights faster.

  1. Why isn’t the personal trainer paying rent?

He’s squatting.

  1. What happened when the personal trainer brought a bear to the gym?

His clients got ripped to shreds.

  1. I asked a personal trainer “Do you need to eat chicken to get muscles?”

He said “No whey!”

  1. Why do hamburgers go to the gym?

To get better buns.

  1. Why doesn’t the fisherman go to the gym?

He pulled a mussel.

  1. Why does the trainer at the gym have to keep getting new clothes?

Because people keep telling him he’s ripped.

  1. Why did the gym-goer get arrested?

She killed her workout.

  1. Why did the couple stop going to gym?

It wasn’t working out.

  1. Treadmills get you nowhere.
  2. Why did the man get arrested at the gym?

He asked someone to check out his guns.

  1. A peephole was found in the gym locker rooms.

The police are looking into it.

  1. A gymnast walks into a bar…

She gets a two-point deduction and loses the gold.

  1. Some priests started a bodybuilding group.

They have a lot of muscle mass.

  1. I once knocked a guy off his bike…

I’ve since been banned from that gym.

  1. I have to make a confession: I’m not bench-pressing anymore.

Wow, that took a real weight off my chest.

  1. What kind of gym do Christians like to go to?

A CrossFit gym.

  1. Why did they open a gym in hell?

So you could exercise your demons.

  1. Why doesn’t Waldo (from “Where’s Waldo?”) go to the gym?

Because no one can spot him.

  1. A man walks into a gym and asks the receptionist, “What machine should I use to impress women?”

She responded swiftly, pointing outside the door, saying, “The ATM machine, sir.”

  1. What’s the easiest way to get a six-pack at the gym?

Take the beer from your fridge and smuggle it in.

  1. It was a real pain canceling my gym membership…

They made me hand in a too weak notice.

  1. It’s been six months since I joined the gym, and still no progress!

I’m going there in-person tomorrow to see what’s going on.

  1. What’s the best gift you can give to a gym addict?

A mirror!

  1. Did you hear about the pumpkins that went to the gym?

They wanted to become jacked-o-lanterns.

  1. A gym junkie is counting loudly in the gym as he does bench presses.

“1! 3! 5! 7! 9!” Says another gym-goer, “Do you even lift, bro?” To which the gym junkie replied, “Nah, I only lift odd, bro.”

  1. Why wasn’t the gym for ants successful?

The owners just couldn’t seem to get the bugs out.

  1. What’s the name of Cardi B‘s super-fit gym-focused sister?

Cardi O.

  1. I go to the gym religiously…

About twice a year, around holidays.

  1. Why did the Uber driver cancel his gym membership?

Because he didn’t even Lyft, bro.

  1. Why don’t you see many haunted gyms?

Everyone inside is exorcising.

  1. Friend No. 1: Why do you like going on night runs so much?

Friend No. 2: The added fear of being murdered really does wonders for my cardio.

  1. What did the Christian say to the ladies at the gym?

“Hallowed by thy gains.”

  1. What do you call a gym that’s really dirty?

A gymnastium.

  1. I asked my trainer at the gym if I could start shadow boxing.

He said, “Knock yourself out!”

  1. What do chickens work on in the gym?

Their pecks.

  1. What’s it called when a rapper goes to the gym for 20 minutes?

A Lil Pump.

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