35+ Kangaroo Jokes And Puns You'll Get A Real Kick Out Of

It’s no wonder there are so many hilarious kangaroo jokes — kangaroos are pretty funny animals. They hop around all over the place. They’re so muscular it looks like they’ve been hanging out at the gym. They even have their own built-in fanny packs in the form of pouches — a trait that makes them marsupials. Another bit of trivia? While kangaroos can hop at speeds of up to 40 miles per hour, they aren’t able to move backward.

Kangaroos also have amusing names. For example, a male kangaroo is known as a buck, boomer, jack, or old man. A female kangaroo is the doe, jill, or flyer, and a baby is called a joey. In addition to hopping, male kangaroos also get into boxing matches with each other, trying to impress the females of the species.

As fun as these facts are, kangaroo jokes and puns pack even more of a punch. Keep reading, ’cause these knee-slappers are guaranteed to make you hoppy.

Best Kangaroo Jokes and Puns

1. Did you hear about the kangaroo with glasses?

He had to go to the hopthalmologist.

1. A mother kangaroo and her baby pass through airport security.

The security guard says, “Sorry ma’am, but you need to take EVERYTHING out of your pocket before you get on the plane.”

1. Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building?

Yes, because the Empire State Building can’t jump!

1. What do stylish kangaroos wear?

Jumpsuits.

1. What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo?

“Hop on!”

1. What animal jumps when it walks and sits when it stands?

A kangaroo.

1. What’s a kangaroo’s favorite candy?

Lollihops.

1. What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and a sheep?

A woolly good jumper.

1. Where do kangaroos like to eat?

At IHOP.

1. What kind of music do kangaroos listen to?

Hip-hop.

1. What kind of music do sophisticated kangaroos listen to?

Hopera.

1. How does a kangaroo pick his favorite baseball team?

He jumps on the bandwagon.

1. What do drunk kangaroos play?

Hopscotch.

1. What do you call a talking kangaroo?

A quantum leap.

1. What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with an alien?

A Mars-upial.

1. What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?

A pouch potato.

1. How do sick kangaroos get better?

They have a hoperation.

1. What do you call 144 kangaroos in a box?

Gross.

1. How does a kangaroo win a gold medal?

In the long jump.

1. What do you call two kangaroos who live together?

Roo-mates.

1. Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?

Because then the kids have to play indoors.

1. What do you get when you mix an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia.

1. A spider, a snake, and a kangaroo walk into a bar…

It’s a normal day in Australia.

1. What do you call a kangaroo that’s exhausted from trespassing?

Out of bounds.

1. A kangaroo is hopping around Australia.

Whenever she stops, a little penguin pokes his head out of her pouch. In Antarctica, a little kangaroo is sitting with some penguins, sneezing and grumbling, “Stupid student exchange program.”

1. A kangaroo, a dolphin, and a snake walk into a bar…

That’s all. It’s funny since none of them actually walk.

1. Why are kangaroos so qualified to be teachers?

Because they’re kan-gurus.

1. What’s something a kangaroo has that no other animal has?

Baby kangaroos.

1. A man is driving down the road, looks out the window, and sees a kangaroo. He’s confused, but he takes the kangaroo into the car and drives to the police station. He asks the officer what he should do with the kangaroo he found. The officer tells him to take it to the zoo right away. The next day, the police officer is driving down the street and sees the same man driving down the street with the kangaroo in his car. He pulls him over and asks why he still has the kangaroo.

“Well,” the man says, “I took him to the zoo, and he liked it so much, today we’re going to the circus!”

1. Kangaroo: [dials 9-1-1] I can’t find my kids!

9-1-1: Did you check your pockets? Kangaroo: [pats pouch] Oh… nevermind.

1. Did you know you can fit 30 bananas in a kangaroo’s pouch?

Also, I’m not allowed at the zoo anymore.

1. What do you call it when a marsupial tricks you?

A kanga-ruse.

1. What’s a kangaroo’s favorite drink?

A juice pouch.

1. What is a kangaroo’s favorite season?

Spring!

1. Why don’t kangaroos make good sailors?

Because they’re always jumping ship.

1. A kangaroo kept getting out of his enclosure at the zoo at night. Knowing it could hop really high, the zoo officials put up a 10-foot fence. However, they were amazed to find the kangaroo was out again the next morning roaming around the zoo. So, they put up a 20-foot fence instead. Again, the next morning, they were amazed to find the kangaroo had still gotten out. Exasperated, they put up a 40-foot fence. As the animals in the zoo watched all this unfold, a camel in the next enclosure asked the kangaroo, “How high do you think they’ll go?”

The kangaroo replied, “About a 1,000 feet, unless somebody starts locking the gate at night!”

1. What do you call an angry kangaroo?

Hopping mad.

1. What do you call a kangaroo DJ?

Disc joey.

1. What is a criminal group of kangaroos called?

A gangaroo.