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Knock, Knock! Who's There? 75+ Hilarious Jokes That Will Knock You Over

You and your kids will love every single one of these.

by Team Scary Mommy
Updated: 
Originally Published: 
knock knock jokes for kids
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Knock, knock jokes are a classic, sure-fire way to elicit hysterical laughter from kids and adults alike. Part-pun, part-riddle, these clean and kid-friendly jests are always a crowd pleaser. (Shh, don’t tell anyone, but there’s also a genre of dirty knock knock jokes for the adults in the room.) Perhaps it’s the nostalgia factor in that they remind us of playground giggles or that they’re so easy to memorize, tweak, and retell. Whatever it may be, knock knock jokes seem to always knock it out of the park.

In fact, the first one may have been written by William Shakespeare. In his play, Macbeth, Act II, Scene III, a drunken porter knocks on the door to speak with three imaginary guests. It was one of the first instances of a call and response kind of joke. Unfortunately, no one would officially pick up on the magic of this comedic phrase until the 1930s. During the Great Depression, people shared knock knock jokes to feel better about the times.

So with that in mind, we’ve gone ahead and rounded up the absolute best knock, knock jokes for every occasion, holiday, and sense of humor.

RELATED: 20+ Hilarious Hanukkah Jokes To Last You Eight Days And Nights

  1. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Amanda. Amanda who? A man da fix your sink!
  2. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Alfie. Alfie who? Alfie terrible if you leave!
  3. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Alien. Alien who? Just how many aliens do you know?
  4. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Abby. Abby who? Abby birthday to you!
  5. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cow says. Cow says who? No, a cow says mooooo!
  6. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Gladys. Gladys, who? Gladys the weekend — no homework!
  7. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Etch. Etch who? Bless you, friend.
  8. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Police Police who? Police let us in, it’s cold out here!
  9. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Tank. Tank who? You’re welcome!
  10. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Voodoo. Voodoo who? Voodoo you think you are asking all these questions?
  11. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Woo. Woo who? Don’t get so excited, it’s just a joke.
  12. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Annie. Annie Who? Annie thing you can do, I can do better.
  13. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Says. Says who? Says me, that’s who!

Knock Knock Jokes: Halloween

  1. Knock knock. Who’s there? Ice cream! Ice cream who? Ice cream, you scream, we all scream for Halloween!
  2. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ben! Ben who? Ben waiting to go out trick or treating all day!
  3. Knock knock. Who’s there? Phillip! Phillip who? Phillip my bag with Halloween candy, please!
  4. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bee. Bee who? Bee-ware, all the ghosts are out on Halloween!
  5. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Boo! Boo who? Don’t cry! It’s only Halloween!
  6. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ice cream! Ice cream who? Ice cream every time I see a zombie!
  7. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ivan. Ivan who? Ivan to suck your blood!
  8. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Witches. Witches who? Witches the way to the haunted cemetery?
  9. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Diane. Diane who? Diane to eat my Halloween candy!
  10. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Eddie. Eddie who? Eddie body get dressed, it’s time to go Trick-or-Treating!
  11. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Frank! Frank who? Frankenstein!
  12. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Voodoo. Voodoo who? Voodoo you think you are?
  13. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ghost. Ghost who? Ghost stand over there and I’ll bring you some candy!

Knock Knock Jokes: Thanksgiving

  1. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Norma Lee. Norma Lee who? Normally I wouldn’t eat this much!
  2. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Phillip. Phillip who? Phillip a big plate of turkey and start eating!
  3. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Arthur. Arthur who? Arthur any Thanksgiving leftovers?
  4. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Dewey. Dewey who? Dewey has to wait much longer for the turkey?
  5. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Esther. Esther who? Esther any more sweet potato pie?
  6. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Tamara. Tamara who? Tamara we’ll be having tons of leftovers.
  7. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Wanda. Wanda who? Wanda go watch the Thanksgiving Day Parade?
  8. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Eddie. Eddie who? Eddie more stuffing and I’m going to get a stomachache.
  9. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ava. Ava who? Ava seen a play about the first Thanksgiving?

Knock Knock Jokes: Christmas

  1. Knock knock. Who’s there? Hope. Hope who? Hope you had a nice Christmas!
  2. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad you were good all year?
  3. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Noah. Noah who? Noah good Christmas joke?
  4. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Anna. Anna who? Anna partridge in a pear tree.
  5. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ima. Ima who? Ima dreaming of a white Christmas.
  6. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Olive. Olive who? Olive the other reindeer used to laugh and call him names…
  7. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Doughnut. Doughnut who? Doughnut open these presents until Christmas.
  8. Knock knock. Who’s there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up and open your presents!
  9. Knock knock. Who’s there? Cole. Cole who? Cole is not what I was expecting for Christmas this year!
  10. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Dewey. Dewey who? Dewey know how long it is until Santa gets here?
  11. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Howard. Howard who? Howard you like to sing Christmas carols with me?
  12. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Yule. Yule who? Yule know when you look out the door.
  13. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Hannah. Hannah who? Hannah partridge in a pear tree.
  14. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Alaska. Alaska who? Alaska Santa Claus for a new scooter.
  15. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Justin. Justin who? Justin time to deliver the Christmas gifts.
  16. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Mary. Mary who? Mary Christmas.
  17. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Alex. Alex who? Alex Santa if you’re on his naughty list this year.
  18. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ho ho. Ho Ho who? Your Santa impression needs some work. New Year’s Knock Knock Jokes.
  19. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Abby. Abby who? Abby New Year.
  20. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Cheese. Cheese who? For cheese a jolly good fellow.
  21. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Razor. Razor who? Razor glass and toast the new year.

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More Funny Knock Knock Jokes!

  1. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Eat. Eat who? Eat your vegetables!
  2. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Park. Park who? Park your bike!
  3. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Hans. Hans who? Hans off my Easter candy!
  4. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Radio. Radio who? Radi-o not, here I come!
  5. Knock, knock! Who’s there? A little girl. A little girl who? A little girl who can’t reach the doorbell!
  6. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Abel. Abel who? Abel to see you!
  7. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Kanga. Kanga who? Actually, it’s Kangaroo!
  8. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Gouda. Gouda who? Gouda
  9. Knock, knock. Jokes, don’t you think?
  10. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Honeydew. Honeydew who? Honeydew you wanna dance?
  11. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Europe. Europe who? No, YOU’RE a poo!
  12. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Omelette. Omelette who? Omelette you finish.
  13. Knock, knock. Who’s there? You. You who? You hoo, anybody home?
  14. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Linda. Linda who? Linda Hand, will ya? Mine is tired from knocking.
  15. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Sue. Sue who? I’ll see you in court!
  16. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Jimmy. Jimmy who? Jimmy crack corn and I don’t care!
  17. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Rhonda. Rhonda who? Is this the rendezvous point? I was told to knock twice.
  18. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Broccoli? Broccoli who? Broccoli doesn’t have a last name, silly.
  19. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Goliath. Goliath who? Goliath down, you look-eth tired!
  20. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Wooden shoe. Wooden shoe who? Wooden shoe like to hear another joke?
  21. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Amish. Amish who? Really? You don’t look like a shoe!
  22. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up and answer the door!
  23. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Doris. Doris who? Door is locked, that’s why I’m knocking!

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