Even though we’ll have to transition our holiday in-person parties to Zoom parties, that doesn’t mean we don’t have to get festive. One of the best parts of Christmas is getting to wear an ugly Christmas sweater (ironically and not ironically). Remember when it actually used to be hard to find an ugly Christmas sweater? Like, you’d have to actually go to a Goodwill or thrift store to find one, and all the most outrageous ones would be gone by the beginning of December. Luckily, the ugly Christmas sweater trend became a bit more #mainstream, so now all of the retailers are offering plenty of choices. There are the classic ugly Christmas sweaters that feature garlands and ornaments, cute-ugly Christmas sweaters, and pop culture ugly Christmas sweaters.
We love ’em all, but here are our favorites this year.
The Best Ugly Christmas Sweater Ideas:
Can it really be ugly if it has Baby Yoda, aka the cutest being in the galaxy, on it? An ugly Christmas sweater can also be cute, and this is a great way to show you’re a big fan of The Mandalorian (which has been awesome this season, BTW). While this is a “men’s” size, anyone can wear it, and we sure are. Right now you also get 15% off on top of the sale price at Kohl’s.
Just slap a National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation quote on it, and bam, you’ve got yourself a hilarious ugly Christmas sweater. This one currently comes in sizes small to 3X-large and is made of acrylic, so it’s not itchy and it’s also surprisingly good quality. One reviewer wrote, “Was looking for this theme in a sweater, not a sweatshirt. This is a real sweater, not itchy, cute enough for parties or ugly sweater contests. Can’t wait for the season!”
Llamas and alpacas are everywhere during the holidays (reindeer aren’t the only animals to get all festive up in here, okay?). Stand out from the crowd and get yourself an adorable alpaca ugly Christmas sweater. If you love llamas more, we’ll get to that in a second.
There you go. We would never forget the llama. And while you’re at it, check out our llama lovers gift guide, because you can never have enough llamas in your life. This sweater comes in a variety of different llamas and colors, so you get to choose your llama mood.
Are you a cat lover and a Christmas lover? This isn’t an ugly Xmas sweater per se as much as it is an ode to cats, because cats are life. Made with a blend of polyester and cotton, this sweater is cozy and machine washer-friendly, so don’t worry too much if you get sugar cookie frosting all over it. It’s not too delicate.
Christmas isn’t complete without watching Home Alone at least once. Made with 100% acrylic, you can also machine-wash this one. One thing to note is that it does come large — which is typically normal for ugly Christmas sweaters, which are looser. “I bought this sweater for an ugly sweater party and was happy with my purchase. The size runs large so I’d recommend going down a size, but the quality is great. The material is very warm and soft and the price was very reasonable or this item,” one Amazon customer said.
It’s a Taco Bell ugly Christmas sweater. Need we say more? Probably not, but we will anyway. This loud and proud sweater is colorful and features the classic Taco Bell tacos (whether they’re soft or hard shell is up for interpretation).
Feeling nostalgic? This actual vintage- sweater features the Peanuts gang and their Christmas tree. Since this IS pre-worn, expect the item to come in a bit worn (but still in good condition). This is part of Urban Outfitter’s Urban Renewal line.
Best Women’s Ugly Christmas Sweaters:
Editor’s note: While there’s no such thing as “women’s things” vs. “men’s things” when it comes to SWEATERS, we know some of you are looking for this. Just keep in mind, here at Scary Mommy, we are here for you wearing whatever the fuck you want. This is *your* ugly Christmas sweater journey, and yours alone.
If you want to be completely outrageous this year, get yourself a sweater covered in garlands and accessorized with an actual snow globe. What is Christmas if not totally extra? Definitely dry clean this one.
If you want something a little more “feminine,” we found this V-neck cardigan which is a little sexy? That’s right, a slightly sexy, ugly Christmas sweater because if you’re feeling yourself, then you’re feeling yourself. It’s got garlands and ornaments on it, so you’d basically look like a sexy Christmas tree.
Similar to the garland cardigan, this one just has candy canes, if that’s more your vibe.
We bet you didn’t see this Christmas poncho coming, did you? It comes in four different styles: Reindeer (as shown), Santa, Elf, and Snowman. Just note that it’s hand-wash only.
If you watched the Tiger King, then you know. While Joe Exotic is in prison for killing endangered tigers and plotting a murder, we’ll still take this line and run with it.
Okay, ONE MORE Christmas Vacation sweater. This pays homage to Cousin Eddie, who’s basically dumping the camper’s toilet out into the street right as the Griswold’s yuppie neighbor Ted comes out to jog.
Best Men’s Ugly Christmas Sweaters:
Not to stereotype or anything, because women like beer too, but if we *had* to pick a “men’s ugly Christmas sweater” it might as well be this one. Aside from its glorious tacky-ness, it also features four drink holders.
Dads, if you need a very Dad ugly Christmas sweater shirt, this one — with Dwight dressed as an elf for one of The Office Christmas episodes — is it. It reminds everyone it’s Christmas, which dads do.
Okay, this one might actually win ugliest and most tackiest Christmas sweater of all. It’s actually a long-sleeved shirt DISGUISED as an ugly Christmas sweater. The gall! The ingenuity! The weirdness! Some customers have even worn it on occasions that are not Christmas-related: “So basically this was a huge hit at church. My pastor couldn’t stop laughing so I guess they nailed it with this design. This shirt is perfect for interviews, parole hearings, blind(literally blind)dates, PTA meetings and even funerals. I highly recommend it, and Baby Jesus thanks you,” one reviewer said.
There’s simply no reason not to indulge yourself or someone you love with one of these festive jumpers (as Mark Darcy and Bridget Jones would say). Tis the season!