50+ Lion Jokes So Fiercely Funny They'll Be The Mane Event Of Any Party

by Team Scary Mommy
Originally Published: 
Lion Jokes and Puns
Anup Shah/Getty Images

When you think of a lion, you probably feel a mix of emotions like fear, wonder, excitement, and awe. And you’ll obviously remember The Lion King, right? What you may not immediately do when you think of a lion is laugh up a storm. You know what, though? The king of the jungle can be pretty darn funny, and we’ve got a plethora of hilarious lion jokes and puns to prove it. Keep reading to see for yourself — they’re totally up to scratch.

These majestic creatures don’t just make good comedic fodder, either. We recommend printing out our fierce collection of lion coloring pages to work on while you share these lion funnies with your kids. Is there any better way to spend an afternoon than giggling while getting artistic? It’s precisely the kind of DIY kids’ activity we could all use more of in our lives.

Of course, if you tear through this list and need more zingers to keep your little ones engaged, well, we’ve got you covered. Choose from a whole zoo of other animal jokes, including camel jokes, shark jokes, otter puns, and even hissss-terical snake zingers.

Best Lion Jokes and Puns


  1. Why wasn’t the lion honest?

‘Cause then he wouldn’t be a lyin’ anymore!

  1. What’s a lion running a copy machine called?

A copycat.

  1. What’s a lion’s favorite soccer player?

Lion-el Messi.

  1. Why did the lion lose at poker?

He was playing with a cheetah!

  1. Why are desert lions so popular around Christmas time?

They have sandy claws.

  1. What do you call a lion with chickenpox?

A dotted lion.

  1. What do you call a lion playing golf?

Roarin’ McIlroy.

  1. What animal do you get when you cross a lion with a camel?

A chameleon.

  1. What do you call a lion powered by a battery?

A Li-on.

  1. What time is it when a lion takes your hat?

Time to get a new hat!

  1. What do you call a lion wearing a stylish hat?

A dandy lion.

  1. What job does a lion do at a newspaper?

Run the linotype machine!

  1. What do you call a lion at the North Pole?


  1. What is a lion’s favorite U.S. state to visit?


  1. Where does a lion sleep?

Anywhere it wants to! Are you gonna stop it?!

  1. What does a lion do on a canoe?

He uses his roar.

  1. What do you call a lion who hosts a talk show?

Larry King of the Jungle.

  1. What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.

  1. Where do you send a letter to a lion?

Mane Street.

  1. The lion’s roar was so big that when I compressed it…

It turned out to be a “.rawr” file.

  1. What does the lion say to his family before they eat a meal?

“Let us prey.”

  1. What animals do you need to make a square?

Four lions.

  1. What do you get if you cross a lion with a watchdog?

A terrified postman!

  1. What’s the difference between a tiger and a lion?

A tiger has the mane part missing.

  1. How do you take a lion’s temperature?

Very, very carefully.

  1. On which days do lions eat the most?


  1. What do you get when you cross a lion and a snowman?


  1. How does a lion greet the antelope it meets on the savannah?

“Pleased to eat you!”

  1. Why don’t lions like fast food?

They can’t catch it!

  1. How does a lion stop a video?

He presses paws.

  1. An arrogant gazelle walks up to a bunch of lions and tells them how much better he is than them.

He was consumed by pride.

  1. How do lions like to pass the time?

Country lion dancing.

  1. I’m always on the verge of belting out “A Lion Sleeps Tonight.”

You might say my urge is a whim away, a whim away, a whim away….

  1. Which scientist discovered the planet Leo 9?

Lioness Pawling.

  1. Would you rather have a tiger eat you or a lion?

I would rather have a tiger eat a lion.

  1. Why do lions always eat raw meat?

They don’t know how to cook, silly.

  1. What baseball team do lions like?

The Cubs.

  1. How much does a lion trainer have to know?

More than the lion!

  1. A creature is born of a lion mother and an eagle father. How does he get into Hogwarts?

The Gryffindor.

  1. What is a lion’s favorite cookie?

Chocolate chimp.

  1. Why did the lion trainer buy new clothes for his first performance with the lions?

He wanted to take “pride” in his appearance.

  1. What do lions wear to bed?


  1. Did you hear about the humble cannibalistic lion?

He swallowed his pride.

  1. What kind of crazy creature do you get when you mix a yak and a lion?

A maney-yak.

  1. What did the lion say when I asked what it was doing in my wardrobe?

“Narnia business.”

  1. Two deer are walking together when another animal comes by.

The animal says, “Don’t worry; I’m not going to eat you.” So one of the deer says to the other, “He’s lion.”

  1. What does a lion call his barber?

His mane man.

  1. Why did the circus lion eat the tightrope walker?

He wanted a well-balanced meal.

  1. Why do lions eat more than other animals?

They always get the lion’s share.

  1. What do a lion and a computer have in common?

They both have mega bites.

  1. What would be a better name than “king of the jungle” for a lion?


  1. A lion would never play golf, but a Tiger Wood.
  2. Why did the lion cross the savannah? To get to the other pride.

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