100+ Hilarious Bird Puns For Kids – Scary Mommy

100+ Of The Best Break-Beak Bird Puns For Your Little Know-It-Owl

November 12, 2019 Updated February 4, 2021

bird puns
Francesco De tommaso/ Pexels

There’s nothing funnier than animal jokes, except maybe hilarious puns for kids that will play on their minds all day. With that in mind, we compiled the absolute best kid-friendly bird, chicken, and turkey puns you’ll tweet home about.

1. A bird stole my snack. You know what I said?
Toucan play at that game.

2. Did you hear the owls having a party last night?
Sounded like a real hoot.

3. What did the turkey say when he forgot to study for his test?
I’ll just wing it.

4. Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
If they flew over the bay, they’d be called bay-gulls.

5. What does the turkey say when he’s using the computer?
Google google!

6. Why did the owl join Tindr?
He didn’t want to be owl by himself.

7. I published a book about birds.
It flew off the shelf.

8. What side of a turkey has the most features?
The outside.

9. What’s green and pecks on trees?
Woody the Wood Pickle

10. How do chickens stay fit?
They egg-cersize.

11. What do you call a parrot that flew away?
A polygone.

12. My friend wanted to have an eagle for a pet.

I said, “Don’t you know that’s ill eagle?”

13. What did the dad turkey say to his stubborn child?
“If your mother could see you now, she’d be turning over in her gravy.”

14. What do you call bird who wins Jeopardy?
A know-it-owl

15. Why does the flamingo stand on one leg?
If it lifted both legs, it’d fall over.

16. I got into a fight with a bird while I was down south.
I have no egrets.

17. Why can’t turkeys go to church?
They only use fowl language.

18. Did you hear about the sad bird?
He was a bluebird.

19.I know a bird who was excluded from his flock for being too big.
He was ostrich-sized.

20. Why do turkeys hate baseball?
The fowl balls and bastes really stress them out.

21. What do you give a sick bird?
Medical tweetment.

22. What do you call an owl who does magic tricks?
Hoodini

23. What birds spend all their time on their knees?
Birds of prey

24. We are not emused.

25. What do you call it when a canary flies into a pastry dish?
Tweetie pie

bird puns, chicken puns, turkey puns
Achim Bongard/ Pexels

26. What did the bird text his girlfriend?
“I’ve been thinking about you owl night.”

27. What did the eagle say when he got cold?
Burrrrrrd

28. What do you call a rude turkey?
A Jerk-ey

29. What do you call an owl who was just caught committing crime?
A spotted owl

30. Did you hear about the crow on the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long-distance caw.

31. What kind of crime are you committing when you attack a bird?
A featheral offense.

32. What does the one-legged turkey say?
Wobble wobble!

33. What do you call a Medieval bird?
A Knight Owl

34. What did the duck eat with his soup?
Quackers

35. What do you call it when chickens play hide and seek?
Fowl Play

36. What kind of math do snowy owls like?
Owlgebra.

37. Why did the turkey cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t chicken.

38. What do you call a crate of ducks?
A box of quackers.

39. When’s the best time to buy a bird?
When it’s going cheep.

40. What do you call it when an owl has an upset stomach and it’s making him grumpy?
Irritable Owl Syndrome

41. The owl outside seems very sick, but he’s not letting it bother him.
He said he couldn’t give a hoot.

42. How many cans do you need to make a bird?
Two cans

43. What kind of bird can you buy at the grocery store?
A kiwi

44. What’s the turkey’s favorite Halloween costume?
A gobble-in

45. How do penguins make a decision?
Flipper coin

46. What kind of bird can carry the most weight?
A crane

47. What kind of birds end up locked up?
Jail birds

48. What did the magician penguin say?
“Pick a cod, any cod!”

49. Came home from vacation to find a bird had broken in and destroyed all my stuff.
He used a crowbar.

50. What do you call an owl who can time travel?
Doctor Hoo.

Related: 160+ Otterly Terrific Kid-Friendly Animal Jokes And Puns Everyone Will Love

 

51. What’s the difference between chickens and turkeys?
Only the chickens celebrate Thanksgiving.

52. Who is the penguin’s favorite relative?
Aunt Arctica

53. What do you get when you cross a duck with fireworks?
A firequacker

54. What do you call an owl who’s all mixed up?
Low

55. What do you get when you cross an owl and an oyster?
Pearls of wisdom

56. What kind of bird runs the church?
A cardinal

57. What did the turkey say to the hunter?
“Quack, quack, quack!”

58. What’s an owl’s favorite kind of book?
Hoooot-dunnit?

59. My best friend was diagnosed with bird flu.
He swears it was fowl plague.

bird puns
Giphy

 

60. What do you call a very rude bird?
A mockingbird.

61. What bird robs you while you bathe?
A robber duck

62. Have you heard of the GPS device they made for bird watchers?
It has tern by tern directions.

63. What do you call a sarcastic turkey?
A smirky turkey.

64. Where do birds invest their money?
The stork market

65. Why did the pelican get kicked out of the fancy restaurant?
He had a massive bill and no money to pay.

66. What do you call a funny duck?
A real wise-quacker

67. What do you call a young bird after he publishes his first book?
A fledgling author

68. What’s a parrot’s favorite game?
Hide and speak

69. What do you get when you teach a turkey witty comebacks?
A turkey who roasts you.

70. What soap do birds use?
Dove.

71. How does a bird with a broken wing land safely?
It uses a sparrowchute.

72. Why do humming birds hum?
They don’t know the words.

73. How do black birds stay together in a flock?
Velcrow

74. What do you call an over-caffeinated turkey?
A perky turkey

75. Where does bird royalty live?
Duckingham Palace

76. What do you get when you cross a bird with a lawnmower?
Shredded tweet.

77. What do you call a turkey that’s bad at bowling?
A gutter ball turkey

78. My bird can predict the future.
He’s an omen pigeon

79. Which bird is always out of breath?
A puffin

80. What do you call a woodpecker with no beak?
A headbanger

81. Why do turkeys make bad baseball players?
They only hit fowl balls.

82. What language do geese speak?
Portugeese

83. Where do crows go to get drunk?
A crow bar

84. What’s a bird’s favorite addition to his salad?
Crowtons

85. What do you get when you cross a parrot and a centipede?
A walkie-talkie

86. What is a turkey’s favorite type of tree?
A poul-tree

87. What’s smarter than a talking parrot?
A spelling bee

88. What do flamingos do at parties?
They flamingle.

89. What do you call a bird with a black belt?
Steven Seagull

90. What kind of bird doesn’t need a home?
A bald eagle.

91. What’s a bird’s favorite game?
Beak-a-boo!

92. What do you call a criminal raven?
A caw-nvict

93. What do retired birds do for fun on the weekends?
They play flabingo

94. What do you call a man with a seagull on his head?
Cliff.

95. What do you get when you cross a parrot and a shark?
A bird that bites your ear off.

96. What’s the opposite of a flamingo?
A flamin-stop

97. What do turkey’s use to drink from?
Gobble-lets

98. What is a crow’s least favorite show?
That’s So Raven

99. What do you get when you cross a flamingo with a Beatle?
Flamingo Starr

100. What did the canary say when his cage broke?
Cheep cheep cheep

101. What do you get when you cross a parrot with a pigeon?
Voice mail

102. My homing pigeon died.
I’m worried it will come back to haunt me.

Related: 30+ Side-Splitting Thanksgiving Jokes You’ll Gobble Up More Than Turkey